Sunday, September 17, 2006

Walking Away

This past weekend was VERY strange.

Husband and I have been arguing all weekend long... like CATS & DOGS! The contention has been overwhelming.

I love him dearly but lately we've just been so impatient with each other. I've been under enormous amounts of stress and something needs to give. I'm afraid to ask my husband to wait while I put my mothers house in order because my husband should be FIRST.... but such is the case.

Often times, when he and I get into it like this -- the first thing we talk about is walking away and not looking back. Divorce and living without each other. After all the arguing and disagreeing and we're just fed up to the HIGHEST, it usually goes down like this....

HIM: so what u wanna do?

ME: what u WANNA do?

HIM: u couldn't handle life without me.

ME: trust me. i've done it before. i don't NEED u.

HIM: yeah right. u wouldn't even make it if i left.

ME: no you wouldn't make it.

Going through the same dialogue after we've done arguing feeds that temporary desire to be rid of each other. And we repeat this dialogue ALL.THE.TIME. Is it healthy? I don't know. It's become a tradition with us.

Truth be told, I love my husband. He is such a positive force in my life. Right now we're struggling through the mundane and we'll get through it.


sunshine said...

You and hubby need to quit it!! When I was married I would get mad and instantly resort to getting a divorce-which I eventually did. Perhaps you all could go through some sort of mediation? I just feel like saying you are leaving over and over again would eventually ring true.....that's just my two cents..

ShellyP said...

Try to change the pattern and see what path it takes you down. I'm no marriage counselor, but I would say talk of splitting is not a good thing. And when you're not arguing, keep up the positive reinforcement of love and affection and words from the heart, so you both know that you want things to be good, not bad or over.