A Tribute for Baby Casen: Tyrayl's Song

A dear friend of mine, Neta, lost her son today. He was born a month or two ago with Spina Bifida. Baby Casen donned his angel wings today and I wanted to post this in his honor.

I wrote the lyrics to this song back in 1991 and another dear friend of mine, Omi, put it to music.  I wrote it when another dear friend, Jenika, lost her son a month after his birth. In 1991, we were just juniors in high school when Jenika bore her first child. We were all there in the hospital when Baby Tyrayl took his last breath. It was very peaceful.... but still so very sad. Hearing the news today that Neta lost Baby Casen made me think of Baby Tyrayl. (A group of us sang this at his memorial service.)

I love my friends. I'm grateful for all of them in my life. Though I don't have children of my own and I could probably never understand a mother's love, I ache and hurt for my friends who have lost a child. **Sending love to Neta in Pensacola, Florida**

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Tyrayl's Song

Mom and Dad, will you remember me?
Mom and Dad, will you still be mine?
Although my time on earth on is done
I will still love you and always will

Mom and Dad, will I see you again?
Mom and Dad, will I feel your touch?
Please be strong until the end
I will wait for you, til we meet again

Chorus:
Dear Father, hear my plea (hear my plea)
Please bless my mom and dad
Give them strength to understand
This is our Savior's plan

Bridge:
Firm and strong, I will be someday
For you to love and hold I pray
I will always live in your memory
So just close your eyes and I'll be there
(Repeat Chorus)

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Rest In Eternal Love Baby Casen!

We've Decided

Husband and I have been married for six years now and it's high time we had children. My body hasn't been able to conceive and I've made peace with that. So, we have been considering adoption. I'm actually quite excited about adoption. As a fellow blogger put it, "It is so beautiful and so Polynesian!". I totally agree.

I think of my Samoan grandmother (my mother's mother) who gave up four of her seventeen children to different families because she knew they would be able to give the best life to her children. That kind of love, the kind that my grandmother had that allowed her to give up her children for their sakes, is selfless. After the murder of my grandfather, my grandmother had few choices on being able to support her family and giving up her children was one of them. Here we are, nearly 50 years later. My mother and her siblings are all in touch and have been for several decades.

Adoption story #2: My parents were foster parents before. January 1994, a three-month old baby boy entered our lives as a foster child in our home. Several years later, the State of Hawaii granted my parents the ability to adopt him. My eyes tear up when I think him, my little brother. He's 16 now and I adore him now more than ever. He's such a handsome kid. A few years later, another boy entered our family as a foster child and was eventually adopted also. He's 12 now. Time flies so quickly!

Adoption IS a natural choice for my husband and I. I don't feel like I have to physically bare a child even though I welcome the opportunity. So, I'm looking forward to this process. My mother tells me that as soon as I adopt, I'd probably get pregnant in no time. That's funny how that works. (A dear friend of mine was down in Mexico earlier this month and bought me some Clomid. She is so funny!)

My husband has been ready to adopt for quite some time. I haven't felt pressure from him to bare children and I have overcome the feeling of inadequacy. My husband has two children from previous relationships so his DNA has already made it to the earth. No pressure there. I guess, the person holding back this process has been me. So the title of this post should be "I'VE DECIDED" instead of We've Decided.