Thursday, November 10, 2005

What's Your Take?

I'd like to get a concensus on what people are REALLY thinking out there. I'm sure the women tell a DIFFERENT story than the men do. I'd really like to understand why people are so obsessed with porn.

Ladies and Gentlemen, please... let me know what you're thinking.

Does porn have an effect on a relationship?
Does it conflict with your morals?
Negative or positive effects on your life and your spirit?

Please... help me understand!

7 comments:

Danja said...

Does porn have an effect on a relationship?

Yes, it does. It is a great asset to our relationship. We both came into the relationship enjoying it and were both happy to find that the other was equally into it. We might find different types appealing, but the fact is, it is something we can share together and it helps our sex life tremendously.

Does it conflict with your morals?

It probably should huh? I mean I dont know how God feels about people watching other people having sex. I mean I guess it goes against the sex being a sacred act between a husband and wife, and the whole thing about exploiting sex is wrong.

Negative or positive effects on your life and your spirit?

I dont think it is that serious for me. I joke about being addicted, but honestly, if all porn was gone tomorrow, I'd be alright. I think that it is different for different people. A lot of women are threatened by their partners watching it, and I admit that I have talked to my partner about certain types of porn that I dont like and what bothers me, etc. BUT I dont ever want him to feel that he has to hide it from me. THAT is the biggest problem, I think, for couples, is when one partner feels he/she cannot be open about their enjoyment of porn. Or when they feel like they have to hide it because the partner will react negatively.

If there is open and honest communication, there should be no problem. Also, if u are someone who enjoys it and doesnt want to give it up, u need to find a partner who either is into it too or doesnt have a problem with u indulging.

The Humanity Critic said...

I guess it depends who you ask and what their specific situation is. I am definitely a porn fein, but only because I am single and a sex-crazed pervert, but when I'm in a relationship and getting it regularly I reducxe my viewing habits.

My sister got mad at her husband because of some porn that she found on his computer. She was acting like him watching porn was in the same stratosphere as cheating. She was bugging, but she got even more upset when I said, "If you broke your man off once in a while he wouldn't need porn." Tep, she's still mad at me..lol

ShellyP said...

1. It can have effects like every other addiction. A person can be spending more time with their porn than their partner. Problem. Or spending too much money on it. Problem. Of course it can add a strain when one's expectations change - i.e. if one partner wants to try new things learned that the other partner isn't ready for.

2. Porn conflicts with Christian morals. Danja said it well. If you consider sex should only be between a husband and a wife, how could a Christian condone all of the illicit sex (and abased sex) portrayed?

3. Negative effects: these are pretty much covered already. Positive effects: you can learn a lot that could spice up your sex life, and it can be a turn on for you and your partner to watch together.

chase said...

I like some porn, bf loves it. I figure since he likes it, I'd rather watch it with him than have him feeling like he has to hide it.

He also looks at the naked women online in the paltalk rooms, and I'm sure has his little fun, but honestly, it doesnt bother me, keep it cute on the computer and I reap the benefits later, lol We share a screename, so I can go on anytime, and women say something and I tell them who I am and its all respect...just like if a guy says something while he's online, he just says its him. respect. Plus, I trust him...if he ever gave me reason not to, that would be different.

I dont think it goes against my morals...it's better than having someone out there doing it...your keeping it within the boudaries of your relationship and using it as an enhancer.

It doesnt bother me, I think it has had mostly a positive effect. and if I see him online too much or watching the tv too much, I let him know and he slows it down. He's a good guy ::::smile::::

Hassan said...

Not going to lie, I got a small collection. I look every now and then on the internet. It doesn't come up, hasn't yet and I I'm aware she has toys. I guess one day it'll hit the fan and we'll probably speak like adults about the matter. Either we'll consolidate or compromise on what we do with it.

Well, that's what I was told.

If she wants me to get rid of it, I will, no regrets no going back. We can make our own.

TheOneandOnlyInsanely said...

Porn and my relationship......

When I had one, it was an issue in the beginning because it was like an addiction. Sometimes we enjoyed it together while we got ourselves "off" together. Later on down the line, I stopped having issues with the porn and embraced it. He continued to hide it and that caused problems. I like everything to be out in the open. Then later on, I opted to masterbate frequently and that caused problems. So I think in the proper dosages and proper timing porn in a relationship can be a wonderful thing, as long as no one is ashamed or embarassed about it.

Porn and me................
I have a growing mini-collection of porn. It gives me new ideas. Sometimes when I am bored I like to watch them and get myself off. Otherwise, I like to use my imagination.

Morally..........
Depending on what you are watching determines the morality of the content. Some porn is just wrong and I don't indulge in that.

Sista K said...

Hmmmm....I used to have guys bring me tapes...back in the day and I watched it with them cuz they liked it...but when I tightened up my moral game I couldnt reconcile it with my spiritual understanding...so I let that go....got rid of the tapes...it wasnt for me really but for my lovers...I am the kind of person...if the person aint there for me to touch, feel, and do it with..it cant really excite me to that level......my writer's imagination can take me there far better than Byron or Kim can...the fact that it really wasnt my thing along with my christian beliefs made it easy for me to leave it alone...for others who are swayed by its allure...I say follow your moral convictions about it...but I dont judge...we all got something we dealing with...