The other night, husband and I went and hung out with my best friend and her man. I loves her boyfriend too. He is the homie!!! Anyway, we sat around having drinks until 5 in the morning, talkin' about love, life and relationships. I swear it was a scene from Love Jones. LOL. I learned something new about everybody, including myself. It was REAL.
The rundown about my BooBoo, pictured with me above, is that she has been there for me without fail.... never tired of my tears... never tired of me leaning on her for strength. Sometimes I take it for granted that she's there cuz well, she's always been there. I don't mean to. I love her dearly -- in a way that very few people can understand. She was there through the nightmare of my first marriage... every step of the way. When it came crashing down, she was there helping me pick up the pieces. She was there through the turbulence of the divorce. Right along side me through my drunken stupor, in tears, drowning in self-pity. Don't get it twisted. We have had some hella good times as well. Lawdie, I can't even count ALLLLLL the memories we've made. No words could fully explain how I feel about her. God bless you, Mama (my pet name for her)!!!! What I learned from her that evening is that she is and will be my sister through all of eternity. Though we've moved on with other lives that may take us in different directions, she STILL understands me like no one else can. I never questioned that she'd be there for me. The Love Jones evening just reaffirmed it. I have been blessed!!!
BooBoo and I met Rico back in October of 2003. I was on my way out of Hawai'i. I barely knew him, but for me, instantly I connected to him... like we've BEEN knowing each other for years. That's how easy it was with Rico. Anyway, I knew I was leaving to St. Louis when we met Rico. He was so easy to talk that knowledge and truth flowed from me to him soooo easily. Basically, he knew ALL my business on like the first evening. I imagine that he has that effect on everyone he comes in contact with... just cuz he's that kinda guy. LOL. He gave me the best advice before I got married again. Simple. Easy. He told me to Follow My Heart. I'm glad I did!! So what did I learn from Rico on Love Jones night? I learned that he's seen alotta trouble in his days. Troubles that I can completely connect with. And he confirmed that he feels the same way about me... like we're siblings. That's truth!!!
Have yall seen the movie, Diary of a Mad Black Woman? that's my life in a nutshell. Me being Kimberly Elise and my current husband being Shemar Moore's character. Things happened between him and I soooo quick.
What did I learn from him on Love Jones evening? He asked Rico the following question: What is the one word that comes to mind the instant you think of BooBoo? Rico answered loyalty and the conversation played on. Later in the evening, out of nowhere, my husband said, "the one word that describes my wife when I look at her is WHOLESOME." He was serious as a heart attack. I almost gagged cuz I've never seen myself that way. In fact, I think I'm the exact opposite. But it doesn't matter how I see myself. He see's me as wholesome and I should thank my lucky stars for allowing him to see me in only that light.
I sat there and couldn't keep a straight face as he explained how he came to that conclusion. I was burning inside with unbelievable feelings that I couldn't comprehend. How did he see me as wholesome when I used to sit beside him with a 40oz. in hand drinking as much as he did? Well not that much... but I drank a whole lot. Was he naive to the fact that I was a hot-blooded woman that enjoyed the company of men? Did he block it out just to see me as a wholesome woman? With this new information, should I strive to become wholesome? Or have I already arrived because his perception of me is already there? **shrugs** I don't know.
What I do know is that I love my husband in such a different way than I've ever loved before. I love that he can hang with me and my friends and can make them his friends. I love that he feels the same way about me. I love that he has placed me on a pedestal. I feel adored. Revered. LOVED!!! I love how he sat there on Love Jones night going on and on about how much he loved me. Could it have just been the alcohol? Nope!!! Cuz he goes on and on about his love for me all the time.
I love you BooBoo and Rico. To my husband, my love for you has no beginning as it will never end. What we have is eternal. Forever. Beyond this world and the next. You are truth and I am so blessed to occupy the space next to you for the rest of my days.