After I received my final decree of divorce from my ex-husband, I went out and got a tatoo right above my right ankle. The actual tatoo and my beautiful leg is pictured to your right. It is kanji for tranquility. I didn't plan it when I went to the tatoo shop. In fact, the visit to the tatoo shop wasn't planned either. It was all spontaneous. BooBoo and I just woke up one morning... we were both off of work... and agreed that it was a good day to get a tatoo. It was just 9am. None of the tatoo shops in the area were open yet... so we sat and contemplated what tatoo we'd get.
My life had changed in a matter of months. I was searching to find ME again. After giving so much of myself to my ex-husband, I realized that I had lost everything that distinguished me from him. I had become him. I knew what he'd say and how he'd react to certain things and his choices became my own. I was no longer an individual and I struggled to "remember" who I used to be.
I couldn't be the woman I was before I met my ex. I just had to be me.
"Hi. My name is Coreen and I'm addicted to love. I'm addicted to being needed by someone. Anyone. I'm divorced. No children. Excellent career. I feel very displaced, like I have nowhere to go and at the same time, I'm EXCITED about the freedom that has just been given back to me."That is probably EXACTLY how I came off and it was all true. I knew that much about me.
When I finally arrived at the tatoo shop, I still hadn't decided what I was going to get. In fact, BooBoo was nearly done with hers and I was still walking around the shop looking at graphics. BTW: BooBoo got "SHUGA" tatoo'd on her left breast. My tatoo had to be significant. It had to mean something. It had to be a public display of the sum total of my being.
I sat down, thought about everything I had been through in the last couple of years and where life had taken me. I looked to my left and there it was....
TRANQUILITY: noun 1) a disposition free from stress and emotion 2) a state of peace and quietI realized that even with all the hurt I had experienced and continued to experience, I was okay. Peaceful, even. Tranquil! It made perfect sense to have that constant reminder tatoo'd on my body and the rest, as they say, is history. Everytime I look at the tatoo, it reminds me to be at peace and count my blessings.
Today, I proudly exclaim: